The Woes of a Jobless Graduate

The abyss. That deep darkness that begs for nothing but takes everything. That creeping thought that slinks into your brain and fills you with doubt, fear and anticipation of future regret.

Graduating from college with a degree you spent four years of your life on and not getting what you think you deserve in return.

These are the woes of a jobless graduate.

Frustration. It is a royal bitch. I think above every other consequence of not getting hired after graduation, the feeling of growing frustration is the worst.

You can plan and plan and plan until there’s not a coherent thought left and still at the end of the day, all your hopes are still in the gutter and no one has called you back.

A friend of mine once used a wonderful analogy for the abyss that comes after graduation. We go to the same restaurant everyday and are told where to sit. Then, one day, when we go there the hostess is gone. Suddenly, the options of where to sit are endless. Sounds good right? A plethora of opportunities and no one to tell us otherwise.

That’s when the fear and doubt slide in. Should I sit near the window? But, if I chose the window I’ll be passing up on the bar seats. If I sit at the bar, I can’t sit in a booth.

Something great turns into something terrifying.

The bottom line is, too many options are more intimidating than too few. What if we mess up and take the wrong seat? We might be damning ourselves to a future we never really wanted and were too young and naïve to realize that at the time.

Not landing a job one month after graduation isn’t that bad. In fact, it’s pretty normal. However, five months later and you’re craving some Paxil to calm your nerves. So many seats available to you and yet, you’re frozen.

Well, I’m here to say to just sit on the damn floor for a while because this blog isn’t going to tell you how to get your dream job or, for that matter, the first job out of college. All I can tell you about is my own experiences and right now I want to share a few things that have and still do frustrate me to no end.

Things I’ve heard countless times concerning my job search:

Ask yourself—would you hire you? 
This has always annoyed me. Of course I’d hire me. I know me. I like me. I grew up with me. I’ve always been there for me and I’m a wonderful listener to me. I work hard at what I want and I’m a wonderful worker with myself.

Ask yourself—if you were them would you hire you? 
Why would I ask myself? I’m applying for a job…so I’m literally asking them “Will you hire me?”

Beef up your resume. 
Unless you want me to lie, I can’t make legit experience appear out of thin air. Hire me and I’ll put that experience on it.

You have to have connections to get a good job. You give me a well-connected person’s address and I will go there with my best business outfit and talk their ear off until they feel like recommending me. Otherwise, the people I already know apparently aren’t too connected considering I still am without a job.

There are more little sayings that I’m sure everyone’s heard, but these are the freshest in my mind. Feel free to leave a comment with your own frustrating tidbit of advice that you were given or leave a wall post or comment on Social Spaz’s Facebook.